Author

Jay London

9 quotations

About Jay London

Jay London is an American stand-up comic, whose one-liner jokes made him a favorite on NBC's Last Comic Standing. Although he did not win either of the two seasons in which he appeared, his humble personality and clean comedy made him a favorite among the show's fans.

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Topics: Funny Dad Dating Home Medical Morning

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?

I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.

It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.

My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.