Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
Author
Fran Lebowitz
27 quotations
About Fran Lebowitz
Frances Ann Lebowitz is an American author, public speaker, cultural critic, and actor. She is known for her sardonic social commentary on American life as filtered through her New York City sensibilities and her association with many prominent figures of the New York art scene of the 1970s and 1980s, including Andy Warhol, Martin Scorsese, Jerome Robbins, Robert Mapplethorpe, David Wojnarowicz, Candy Darling, and the New York Dolls.
Read on Wikipedia → Find books by Fran LebowitzAs a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.
Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior.
Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
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Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
You're only as good as your last haircut.
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.
Polite conversation is rarely either.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
You're only as good as your last haircut.
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adul…
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
If you're going to America, bring your own food.
Andy Warhol made fame more famous.
I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior.