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QUOTES BY George Burns

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'You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.'


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'Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.'


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'If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.'


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'Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.'


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'At my age flowers scare me.'


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'I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.'


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'I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.'


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'I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.'


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'I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.'


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'I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.'


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'I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.'


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'Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.'


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'Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.'


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'When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.'


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'If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.'


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'I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.'


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'Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.'


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'I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.'


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'Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.'


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'Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman it depends on how much happiness you can handle.'


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'Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.'


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'Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman it depends on how much happiness you can handle.'


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'I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.'


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'Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.'


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'I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.'


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'I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.'


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'I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.'


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'Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.'


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'I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.'

 

 

 

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